#he would be hilarious

[ultravioletbrit]

“spin” - Jegulus microfic - @into-the-jeggyverse - 410 words

CW: drinking / smoking

“Ok! We’re playing fuck, marry, kill!” Barty announces, overly excited.

The party has been over for a while, but there’s still a group of them lingering in the common room playing random drinking games and they’re all fairly drunk by this point.

“Alright…” Barty thinks, looking around the circle “Reg! Fuck, marry, kill–”

“James.” Regulus answers instantly without letting Barty finish.

“Ugh. Reggie, you have to wait for the… wait what?!” Sirius starts then cuts himself off when he registers what Regulus said.

“You want to fuck James?!” Sirius asks looking shocked and appalled.

“You want to marry me?” James swoons with hearts in his eyes.

“I think you’re both focusing on the wrong thing here.” Peter tries to interject.

“I think we should have played spin the bottle instead.” Marlene grumbles under her breath from the other side of the circle.

“The bottle’s pointing at James!” Regulus yells as he starts crawling across the circle to James.

“No one even spun the bottle, Reg.” Dorcas tries to grab Regulus but he’s too far away, so she just falls back to where she was laying in Marlene’s lap.

“I don’t think Reg knows how to play any of these games.” Remus says as he passes a joint to Peter so he can try to grab Sirius who just got out of the chair the two of them are sharing.

“Stop that right now! What is happening!?” Sirius trips on his way to try and pull Regulus off James to stop what has turned into a rather intense make out session.

“Is no one concerned that Reg wants to kill James?” Peter asks seriously as he lets out a puff of smoke.

“He doesn’t actually want to kill James, you high idiot.” Mary rolls her eyes and smacks Peter on the back of the head as she steals the joint.

“I wouldn’t be so sure, Reg has some weird kinks.” Evan says as he’s reaching for the half empty bottle in the middle of the circle that was never spun, but is pointing at James.

“I think everyone’s really drunk and we should all go to bed.” Lily announces from her spot on the floor, dropping her head on the couch behind her.

“I think you’re really pretty.” Pandora looks at Lily from where she is laying upside down on the couch with her legs hanging over the back, her head laying right beside Lily’s.

Regulus and James continue to make out, completely oblivious to everything else around them.

[butchfalin]

the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

[a-scary-lack-of-common-sense]

Local idiot absolutely destroys his twin brother

⚠️ Do not try this at home❗️⁉️

[brainrotcharacters]

the easy grip on the knife. the leg over the seat. the hand over the other seat. the sassy "come get it" move. you know the bitch is smiling behind that mask even as he said the line.

[ruubesz-draws]

What if...

April Fools!

*DO NOT REPOST MY ART*

[idkaguyorsomething]

“apollo wrote the hamilton musical in pjo” “hermes wrote the hamilton musical in pjo” you fools. ¿have you forgotten who the greek god of theatre is?

[tinukis]

HATERS MAD I CAN EXPERIENCE CHILDLIKE WONDER ☀️🌟‼️‼️‼️

egghead becoming animated has permanently changed me as a person

[gumdefense]

We have moved past Maya and Franziska wingmanning narumitsu as a society. They would not fucking do that. We need to realise the truth which is that Larry and Gumshoe would try to wingman them and only succeed through failure

[undertheredhood]

the rest of the justice league: hey man, we get that he’s your son and all, but shouldn’t you do something about him?

bruce ‘that’s my precious baby boy’ wayne: i’m sorry, did you have to hold your son as he was dying in your arms? did you almost k*ll yourself trying to follow him to the afterlife? i don’t think so.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Kiss Kiss Fallen Tree!

[First] Prev <–-> Next

[ashprince-of-bel-air]

They didn't deny it so he absolutely does.

All that blood has to rush somewhere.

[ruby-red-inky-blue]

one of my favourite things about AO3 tags is their dedication to canon accuracy, even when that means it devolves into complete mayhem like

Percy was not named with a fan following in mind, this was clearly a running gag but it's his name so they have to use all of it

[egophiliac]

this is basically what happened, right?

(these guys are very lucky that everyone at NRC 1) has the combined intelligence of a sack of bricks, and 2) is easily distracted by shiny things.)

[iwoulddieforienzo]

Personally I think percabeth is at its best when Grover is in it. I don’t necessarily mean in a polycule way I just think it’s great when he’s around

[laatteheart]

they're all freaks, your honour

[goldensunset]

when people refer to canon story-relevant kingdom hearts games as ‘spinoffs’ it makes me sad not only for the obvious reasons i always say but also bc like man i WISH this series had spinoffs. imagine what they could do if they had permission from nomura to truly go off the rails and ignore the greater canon for a second and just do some fun whimsical plotless thing in an alternate universe. imagine a fishing/boating game on destiny islands. kh fighting game. it is an injustice that we have been deprived of kingdom karts. can anyone hear me